I'm going to warn you now that this may be a long post! It's taken me quite some time to get together what I want to say; and to be honest I've been having a blast working so hard with training, nutrition, my day job and fitting in time for clients and advising my amazing supporters, that this is the first time I've managed to sit down and put it together.
So...I am now in week 10 of the USN Challenge - It's gone so fast and I cannot believe how much I have changed, grown and developed.
My whole outlook on life is amazing and I can't wait to continue on this journey.
Many of you reading this, and those who have read 'my story so far' will know that the past 5-6 years haven't been amazing to say the least. Having an eating disorder is basically like existing without a life; no happiness, no passion - just a hollow existence.
I don't want to get all wallowing and go on about the ins and outs of it, but, I chose to fight the illness! There have been good months, bad months and many months where I was stagnant but I never once gave up the fight. I just dug deep, took a different path and continued on the road to recovery.
When I started this challenge I was still caught in a battle with anorexic thoughts - no where near as frequent or bad as previous years - just occasionally the voice would be there trying to stop me following my dreams, knocking my confidence and putting doubts in my mind as to whether I was really good enough to fulfil my dreams and passions.
10 weeks on...I can confidently say that I have WON the battle!!
At around week 8 I was talking to my parents about the challenge and how its caused an unbelievable change in me. They agreed that I am a whole new person.
I am no longer controlled by this negative illness - I Came, I Fought and I Conquered Anorexia!!
It's by no means been an easy process, but worth it? Absolutely.
I seriously can't thank USN enough for holding this challenge, and for all their team and athletes supporting me throughout it. When Dave Titterton tweeted about me being part of Team USN, and having a drive that will make me succeed, EVERYTHING changed!! I am forever grateful for that - it gave me that final boost of confidence to believe in myself and fight to the end.
Without this challenge I could guarantee I wouldn't be where I am now. I would have got here eventually because it's not in my nature to quit (my PT likens me to a terrier!), but this has been my catalyst to change, and I am going to continue putting 100% into my training, nutrition and development so I WILL achieve everything I want to achieve (there is a lot!)
So here's to a new chapter, a brighter, healthier, fitter future.
At this time I can't think of anything better to say than - what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.
It's All About Results!
(I also want to thank everyone who has supported me so far during this challenge - it means the world to me and I am humbled by everyones kind words and help. I never thought I'd be someones idol, but hey, I'll take that!)